That phallic rocket all makes perfect sense now. This video shows stud actor Leonardo DiCaprio walking over towards billionaire Jeff Bezos and hugging his girlfriend.

She was holding hands with Bezos, but you can tell she 100% wanted to go home with Leonardo that night.

All the money in the world can’t make up for Bezos lack of manliness and there’s no way any woman in her right mind would chose the miniature billionaire over the towering bro from The Departed.

There’s just no galaxy in the universe that Bezos could fly to where any woman would select him over Leo. It would never freaking happen.


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